I believe that we need to focus on loving ourselves first, instead of loving the idea of others loving us. We put so much more stock into the love of others that we often don’t realize the importance and power of loving ourselves. However, I am not naive enough to think that you can just flip a switch and love yourself overnight. I also know, from personal experience, it isn’t always easy to love yourself. In honor of February, the month of love, I decided to focus more attention on loving myself. Well, how do I do this? Where should I start? Let’s do this together! Here are 11 tips to help you love yourself.
“Loving yourself isn’t vanity. It’s sanity.” -Andre Gide
11 Tips To Help You Love Yourself
List What You Love About Yourself
Sounds simple enough, right? I’ll be honest this was a little more difficult for me than I thought it would be. Look at yourself in the mirror because this is often what we see in the world. Our disappointment in others often reflects our disappointment in ourselves. So I believe that if we start seeing the good in ourselves, maybe we will start seeing a little more good in the world. It all has to do with our outlook. If we are overly critical of ourselves, more than likely we will be overly critical of others. Here is some of my list. I hope this inspires you to sit down and make your own.
- good mother
- put others first
- red hair
- green eyes
You won’t always be where you want to be in life or have what you want all the time. Remember that there are others out there that might never have what you have, even in these moments where you don’t feel like you have enough. I also try to remind myself that I prayed for what I have now, even on the day it seems too tough. You are in control of how you look at yourself and life, in general. Show gratitude for yourself and it will be easier to show gratitude for others.
Do Something Everyday To Make You Smile
Life is short. Love yourself enough to do something every day that makes you smile. A happy person tends to love themselves more than an unhappy person. If you love yourself, you want to be happy. You know that you deserve happiness. This doesn’t have to be a huge task. In fact, it can be really small as long as it makes you smile. For example, I look forward to my coffee every morning. It makes me smile. I treat myself by buying flavored coffee and flavored creamer. I have my own coffee bar and it makes me smile (and it is cheaper than Starbucks!) So added bonus, it makes my husband smile too! Hahaha! Find something that makes you smile and do it every day!
Accept What Is
A lot of times, our idea of perfect or our idea of happiness can get in the way of loving ourselves and finding true happiness. Once you realize that you need to process your life with what is, and not with what you think life should be your day to day life will become much easier. Life might not be what you had planned, but you are alive. Accept the truth and it will be much easier for you to work towards the possible.
Don’t Put Too Much Focus On Winning Love/Approval Of Others
This can sometimes be difficult, especially when you just want people to like you or make new friends. I won’t lie this one was hard for me when I first became a mom because it was so hard for me to make mom friends. I found myself acting differently around other moms and one day I got tired of it. What good are friends if they don’t like the real you?
You can not truly love yourself until you forgive yourself. We aren’t perfect. We make mistakes and bad choices, but that doesn’t make us bad. The past is over, don’t let it continue to affect your future. Let go and move on, this will be the start of loving yourself.
Take Time For Self-Care
This one is huge and can be so difficult for some people, especially moms. As a mom, I often put my needs on hold. I don’t regret that. I would do anything for my family. However, last year I came to a harsh realization. Because I hadn’t been taking the time to take care of myself, my anxiety reached an extremely unhealthy level. You have to take care of yourself so that you can take care of your family. You can read my post about self-care tips for moms here.
Distance Yourself From The Negative
If you are surrounded by negative people, it is easy to allow negativity to control your thoughts and mind. The people you surround yourself with should motivate, inspire and respect you.
Take Time To Meditate And Journal.
Prayer, meditation, and journaling are so important in my daily life. This goes hand in hand with self-care for me. Do whatever keeps you centered and focused on the importance of life.
Be Patient And Talk Yourself Happy
Talk sweetly to yourself. Whatever you think is what you will be. Do you believe you are a good person? Do you believe you are worthy? Tell yourself these things and I promise you that it will make you feel so much better.
My Personal Belief
Realize you are loved by someone that is greater than any one of this world. You are the child of God. He loved you before you were even conceived. He knew you and He has plans for you.
“Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.” -L. Hay
I hope these 11 tips to help you love yourself jump starts your journey of self-love. Remember you are worthy. I wish you all the best on this journey.
“But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31